Chapter 1: Will I be good enough?

Here I am writing my first blog post so bare with me.

Welcome to the Little Mum Book where I will share my story of becoming a step mum at a young age. In order for this story to make sense and as a disclaimer I must first express how lucky I am to be a step mum. It is a privilege to be adopted by a child as a parent and I wouldn't change it for the world. I must also thank and mention my loving fiancé who has accepted me as a new parental figure, trusted me with his child, and stood by my side through every single thing we've been through...and trust me, the list is long.

Family is not always blood, family is love.

The first day I met my step son, I was petrified, excited, doubtful, nervous, and all the emotions you could think of.

Would I be good enough?

Would he like me?

Will he run away from me and scream "you are not my mother"?

This may seem silly, but these are the thoughts that were going through my head as we pulled up to his pre-school that Thursday afternoon.

Lucky me, this sweet gentle soul was all smiles and giggles as he got into his seat in the back of the truck. FIOUF. The ice was broken. Next came the questions.

Where do you live?

What's your name again? Where do you work? What's your favourite color?

... and the list goes on. I call this the testing stage.

My step son was curious.

Who is this girl?

My daddy's friend?

Is she going to stay for a long time?

Oh how I wish I could read his beautiful little 4 year old mind. We went grocery shopping that first day and he was running everywhere around the market. This was my first experience grocery shopping as a "parent", and boy was it different than my single grocery shopping at the fresh fruits and vegetable market near my downtown apartment, but I loved it.

Now I'm not saying this story will be all perfect and positive and that motherhood is the easiest thing, but this first story was pretty perfect, minus the running & sweating at the market to catch flying screaming child.

I guess when I think about it now, these questions I asked myself before meeting my step son for the first time were also the questions I later asked myself when I found out I was pregnant [another story for another time]. What I mean by this is although these feelings were pertaining to me becoming a step-mum, these feelings were completely from not knowing if "ME"...I was good enough to take on this role as a mother figure, which would be quite significant for this little individuals' life. I felt alone in this and although I had some friends who had kids, I never had a friend that became a step mom and this is why I am starting this blog. For the new mothers looking for tips, for new step-mums that have no idea if they are alone feeling certain ways, for women possibly starting a relationship with a man who had a child [children]. My goal is to reunite and uplift this little or who knows maybe large community to make the world that much happier, more confident, or simply less lonely.

Don't worry, it won't be only long sentimental stories. I will also list affordable fashion for families and home ideas I love and use in my household as well.

See you next read,

Love,

Little Mum Book

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